I'm Going to Go Out on Limb Here...

...and say Donna Pittman is...well...hot.

A Beautiful Relationship

Because Ray has neglected to put this one up (he's the one that found this treasure) after repeated requests I'm putting in over-time to get this one out to you guys. For a little added nostalgia, because it's 'round about this time our relationship with dip began, I'm listening to Gun's and Roses' "Appetite for Destruction" as I type. Even though the author uses the term "lipper" (must be some regional term for chew), I think several of us (I'm thinking Jones, Sarge, maybe Bronco) can identify with this article on Phat Phree.

In Case You Find Yourself in San Quentin

While posting on the prison-tatted Nazi I remembered reading about an especially ingenious alcoholic beverage inmates brew in prison called Pruno. The following are the required ingredients you'll need to get started:

* Ten oranges. In our prison commissary, Valencia oranges were on sale, ten for $2. Your prison commissary may differ.

* An eight ounce can of fruit cocktail. In this case, an 8.5 ounce can of Del Monte's "fruit cocktail in heavy syrup," for 90 cents.

* Forty to sixty sugarcubes. Either hang out with old people who still use sugarcubes or steal a ton of sugar packets from the local deli.

* Sixteen ounces of water. Tap is fine, since like, you *are* in prison.

* A big plastic bag that can be sealed. Trashbags and rubber bands are totally cool. We used Ziploc bags.

* Some ketchup. Six packets of ketchup from the local deli should cover things nicely. Please use Heinz, because anything else is kinda nasty and will ruin your Pruno.

* A towel.

Read the full article - "Make Your Own Pruno and May God Have Mercy on Your Soul" - at The Black Table.

Look Who I Met At College, Mom!

Silvio, I don't know if I can agree with you that tattoos make people look dirty. This upstanding gentleman looks as fresh as they come. I'm not sure but I think I've even read somewhere that Neo-Nazis actually shower twice, sometimes three times a day...with Dove...depending on how many "coloreds" they curb stomp while doing the thankless job of cleansing the human race.

Bowled Over By The Past? Spare Me!

In a bit of Internet incest, I'm linking to my regular blog, Blaaaaaahhg, because there's a new post I've written about an old bowling coach of mine.

Where's Lucy?

Does anyone know anyone like this? For the past four days the house has been in shambles - beer bottles, laundry, and dishes everywhere. So when the person who is responsible for the mess decides to do some cleaning he gets sidetracked midstream, leaving everything only partially finished - and this I've found is his regular M.O.

For instance, on the porch prior to the "clean-up" there were three beer bottles, a pair of shoes, and a full glass of wine complete with drowned bugs. After the clean-up - a pair of shoes and a full glass of wine (bugs still intact). Why wouldn't you, while you're at it, grab your shoes and the glass of wine? Like why would you move on to another task prior to finishing the one that's only going to take 30 seconds to do anyway? Do you forget? Or, is it that you just can't bring yourself to see it completed because...oh, I don't know...you are afraid of success?

If anyone has any psychological insight, maybe because you're this way, I'd appreciate it.

Piano Keys-Spring 07

Pool Chalk

Does anyone recognize this room?

Once again, down go the cards, 17-8 no less. If anybody is interested T-Bird and me are going to the game Friday night. (June 15)

Party at Outlaw Cigar Shop

Check out their website here.

Drumming As Revelation

Who knows how or why these things occur when they do, but it just struck me that the Muppets drummer Animal was most likely based on the incredible Who drummer, Keith Moon. I've watched the Muppet Show since I was a boy and have listened to The Who for the past 20 years, but I didn't put it together until now. They even look alike, especially in the eyebrows. Wow!

Look Up At The Sky- Spring 07

CLICK ON PICTURE TO ENLARGE

Shotgun-toting Grannies

General (aka. T-Bird),

Ran across this old gem and thought of you.


Quote from SNL "Debate 92'" skit:

Sam Donaldson: Governor Clinton, let's be frank. You're running for president, yet your only experience has been as the governor of a small, backward state with a population of drunken hillbillies riding around in pickup trucks. The main streets of your capital city, Little Rock, are something out of L'il Abner, with buxom underage girls in their cutoff denims prancing around in front of Jethro and Billy Bob, while corncob-pipe-smoking, shotgun-toting grannies fire indiscriminantly at runaway hogs.

Bill Clinton: I'm sorry, Sam, do you have a question?

Sam Donaldson: My question is: How can you stand it? Don't you lose your mind living down there?

Bill Clinton: Sam, you must have watched too many of my opponent's TV spots. I'm tired of the Bush campaign trying to portray my home state as some sort of primitive Third World country. The fact is, Arkansas did have a long way to go, but we've made progress. When I started as governor, we were fiftieth in adult literacy, and last year, I'm proud to say, we shot ahead of Mississippi. We're #49, and we're closing fast on Alabama. Watch out, Alabama - we got your number!

Jose "Don Pepin" Garcia Cigars

These are coming in the mail tomorrow. Here's what Cigar Envy says about them:

These cigars, along with Pepin’s Tatuaje line, define full-bodied cigar. Once you have smoked one of these, you will realize that any other non-Cuban cigar you have ever smoked that you thought was full-bodied was…not.

Some people swear that the Don Pepin Garcia Blue Label blend is identical to the Tatuaje. I disagree. The Tatuaje seems more refined than this intense dynamo. The Blue Label is raw power combined with full flavor.

I like the Delicias, which is a 7 inch by 50 ring Double Corona with a dark, oily Corojo wrapper and a Criollo binder. The filler is a blend of Corojo and Criollo.

The first thing you notice on lighting up a Delicias is a “hit” of pepper and sweet spice that settles quickly into a very earthy and aromatic mix of leather and cedar. The wrapper adds in flavors of coffee and a hint of cocoa. About a third of a way into the stick, it all blends into a creamy, spicey, peppery mix with hints of a Cubanesque tang — and it stays that way until the long, nutty finish.

The thing that struck me while trying to find the best way to describe the taste of a Don Pepin Garcia Blue Label for this review was that it is as if a mild and complex old Cuban El Rey del Mundo Choix Supreme was somehow ramped up to a full-bodied, full-strength cigar while managing to keep most of its nuances.

This is not a cigar for beginners. Nor for daytime or an empty stomach. Enjoy it after a full meal and you will marvel at what Don Pepin can do with Nicaraguan tobacco.
Don Pepin Garcia Blue Label cigars

The suggested retail price of the Don Pepin Garcia Blue Label Delicias is US $175.00 per box of 25, or about $7.00 each. The best online price I know of at the moment is $148.95 per box at Payless Cigars, which is about a 15% discount and takes the price down to $5.96 per stick.

I got them on Famous Smoke Shop for $119.95.

Boulevard Smokestack Series

Once a month, the Catholic young adult group I’m on the steering committee for, hosts something called Tuesday’s on the Boulevard. After Mass at Sacred Heart Guadalupe we all walk down to the Boulevard Brewing Company for beer, pizza, and socializing. The new brew house they built, and opened last fall, is the epitome of utility and stylish sophistication, complete with a spacious banquet room that faces North toward the city. If you walk out onto the patio, which runs the length of the banquet room, you’ll find a gas fireplace made of stacked cannonballs to keep you warm. There’s even one of those 25 cent stationary binoculars with which to get a closer view of the city (hardly needed).

But this post isn’t about the new facilities, it’s about the new beers Boulevard will be offering at the end of the summer! If you’ve been enjoying the new Lunar beer that Boulevard came out with several months ago, there’s more new beer on the way! Last month I was privileged to actually try a few of the prototype beers they had on tap down in the employee lounge.

Apparently, this September they’ll be rolling out a new line of beers called the Smokehouse Series, which will include two very strong Belgian-style beers - a Saison (11%) and a bottle-conditioned Golden ale (8%). The first of these tasted much like the blue label Chimay (at least as far as strength, color, and Belgian-style go...Chimay isn't actually a Saison style beer) - and the second was similar to Duvel. The beer will be bottled in champagne bottles with a cork for added Belgian authenticity.

The third beer on offer will be a Double IPA. This isn't my favorite style of beer - especially considering it has double of what I don't like a lot of - hops. But, if you're one of those people that thinks the closer your beer tastes to a grapefruit the better - this one's for you.

When Original Inspiration Is Defeated by Sameness

I suppose I like the English language well enough to be intellectually tickled when I happen upon a Web site like Urban Dictionary. For the uninitiated, Urban Dictionary is a bit of what it sounds like: a collection of words, phrases and even individual letters (under "A" there's a picture of Fonzie)created and submitted by individuals to describe people, places and events. The overall tenor of the site brings to mind what one might find spending a Saturday night cruising aimlessly with a bunch of teenagers: Sometimes you'll grasp the nature of their jokes, but mostly it's all insider talk, which is of course half the fun of it.

Perusing the Word of the Day archive, I came across some examples of what the site is about. (Entries include the date the word was added as well as a tally of user's votes of thumbs up or down: virtual slaps on the back for approval or bored, "whatever" eye-rolls of dissatisfaction.)

June 2 dick flick 1973 up, 180 down

The testosterone-driven opposite of a "chick flick". Generally contains lots of car chases, explosions, and boobs.

May 30 BOBFOC 1164 up, 517 down

Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch. A person who possesses a killer body but has a face that only a mother could love.


I'll admit these examples are juvenille, but that's fine because there's more to it than that. What I appreciate is the fact that these words capture real-life examples of things I know and have seen, but have never identified. Wade through the many pages of immature banality on the site and you'll find similar instances of recognition, producing a knowing smile.

---------------

What's wonderful about the English language of course is its maleability. We can stretch it, twist, turn and tweak it to fit our needs. Even better is a by-product of this act, whereby we create an insular family of friends speaking a language no one else understands. So it's the joy of creating this new, albeit limited language that appeals to me when I encounter a site like Urban Dictionary.

--------------

And while I consider myself someone who is fairly unique, at least when it comes to creating stupid words, I was shocked to learn that two words I thought I had complete ownership of (gaysian and faggage) were in fact submitted to the site by two other like-minded folks over three years ago! So much for originality; so much for being clever. (It should be parenthetically stated here that one other of "my words," linguistist, is currently under consideration for inclusion by the UB Editors. I'll let you know it's fate as soon as I know.)

On one hand I was disappointed to learn my self-coined joke-words, previously shared only with my wife, had been stolen by an anonymous troglodyte (probably an acne-riddled 16 year-old boy who spends way too much time on the computer), the other hand holds a kind of lesson, I suppose. I mean, so what if my brand of humor is shared by some loser in Peoria? I should be happy that there are others out there willing to be silly, and are just as willing to broadcast it over the Internet for all of their friends--assuming they have friends--to enjoy. Because in the end, I'm laughing right along with them, even if I don't get the joke everytime.

Fountain Project- Spring 07

Click on pictures to enlarge.

ROYALS WAX CARDINALS

8-1

DOWN WITH THE CARDS!!!

1851 Navy Colt Revolver

Shot a revolver similar to this a few weeks ago at the range on post.

Drinking Muhammad's Urine a Blessing?

The following is the opening paragraph from an article in today's New York Times entitled, A Compass That Can Clash With Modern Life:

CAIRO, June 11 — First came the breast-feeding fatwa. It declared that the Islamic restriction on unmarried men and women being together could be lifted at work if the woman breast-fed her male colleagues five times, to establish family ties. Then came the urine fatwa. It said that drinking the urine of the Prophet Muhammad was deemed a blessing.

Bronco, have they implemented the breast-feeding policy at Cerner yet?

Paulie...likes Chicken

Just when I thought I was out...They pulled me back in.

The Truth Project: Some Initial Impressions

I went over to the Sarge's compound last night for some "fellowship" and to listen to and discuss a lecture given by Dr. Del Tackett for The Truth Project. On their website the lecture we listened to last night is described this way:

Lesson 2 - Philosophy and Ethics: Says Who?

Truth is not simply an academic concept. The way we think about truth has a direct bearing upon the way we live our lives. What's more, our understanding of right and wrong is directly dependent on our worldview: is the universe God's creation or a closed cosmic cube?

To sum up the basic thrust of Tackett's lecture would be to say that the universe, from a Biblical worldview, is not a closed cube. Tackett describes the universe as a cube (not literally) in which a transcendent God is actively involved. Whether we believe this or not has necessary consequences on our concept of right and wrong.

There's nothing here I'd argue with except that I would liked to have heard some discussion about how we've arrived at this point where right and wrong seem to be up for grabs. For example, what cosmological discoveries influenced the Western world to abandon the notion that humans have a priviledged place in the universe? How have scientific and technological discoveries effected our reliance on a Biblical worldview where a transcendent God controls all that happens? How have political and economic ideologies (democracy and capitalism) - that many conservative Christians celebrate - contributed to an increasingly "subjective"/"culturally relative"/"postmodern"/"Godless" worldview?

For the most part I agree with the conclusions Tackett comes to, I just wish he would have given a broader (fairer) perspective on how the above mentioned developments shook the "firm" foundation of Truth we Christians hold as the building block of living the life God intended.

Yes! Paris Back to the Clink

Enjoy this little Paris montage


I tell you what, for a second there I was a touch irritated when I heard Ms. Hilton was going to skip out on jail time and serve it at her palatial mansion in Hollywood. The proletariat in me was overjoyed, though, when the judge got wind of it and sent her back to jail.

I love this quote,

"It's not right! ...Mom!"

Bye Paris. See you when you get out.

Getting Rich Kiyosaki Style

After spending the past 10 years of my early adulthood avoiding financial responsibility I've begun to take an interest in investments and making money. My boss told me about a book by Robert T. Kiyosaki called Rich Dad Poor Dad. Rather than rewrite it I'm just going to cut and paste an email I sent to my friend where I tell him about the 1031 Exchange that Kiyosaki mentions.

I think I told you on Saturday that i was reading this book called Rich Dad Poor Dad. He mentioned the 1031 in an example scenario where he made a bunch of money. Apparently, back in the mid 90s the housing market in Phoenix was doing poorly. He found a house that normally went for $100,000 but now was appraised at $75,000. He bought it at an auction (or maybe he found it at some Bankruptcy attorney's office) for $40,000. Because all his money was tied up in stocks and Apartment buildings, he borrowed $2,000 from a friend of his for the down payment. He listed it in the paper for $60,000 and he said there was a "feeding frenzy" considering he was selling the house for considerably cheaper than it was worth. Once he had ownership, he sold it. Charged the buyer with fees for finding the house, paid back his buddy, and put the $20,000 he made toward another property...on and on down the line till he had made $190,000.

He said he'd rather not have the bank pay the him the principal, because he'd be taxed heavily. But now, at 10% interest (I don't know where he comes up with this interest rate...I don't think the 1031 allows him to put this money toward an investment that is not of "like-kind") he's making 19,000 a year for doing nothing. Speed up to 2007 and that's probably between 30 and 40 thousand.

Look for me down at the courthouse auction next month bidding on foreclosed homes...as soon as the bank qualifies me for a loan.

Padron 1964 Anniversary...or the 1926 Serie

Padron 1964 Anniversary
Originally uploaded by v2or

Today on my way to work I reflected a bit on my love affair with tobacco over the years. It's not that I'm proud of my addiction, just that I'd never taken the time to actually admit to myself that I love tobacco - in all its forms. Pictured here is my latest infatuation or preferred conduit for nicotine - the Padron 1964 Anniversary Series...or the 1926 Serie - any size.

I'm not necessarily gifted with a golden palate (although I did win a whiskey tasting/guessing contest in Ireland several years ago), but when something is perfect I think everyone knows it when they taste or see it. I'll skip over all the pretentious talk about the various subtleties connoisseurs speak of when critiquing a particular cigar and briefly mention a few things that any layperson might note when smoking a Padron 1926 or 1964.

1. The aroma of the smoke tastes similar to the way the tobacco smells. Not that all good cigars should be like this, just that I find this unique to Padrons. If you like the sent of fine tobacco, and want to taste it in the smoke. Have a Padron 1926/64.

2. While smoking this cigar I didn't experience much acridity, even down to the last two inches or so. This is pretty rare in my cigar smoking experience.

3. The ash is always white and solid. No need to use an ashtray till at least an inch and a half.

4. The construction is simultaneously solid and light, which is a odd combination to me. Regardless, it always has an easy draw.

Well, I said I'd be brief so I'll wrap it up. The above are four things that I love about both the Padron 1926 Serie or the 1964 Anniversary. If you've got the cash I recommend buying the Maduro Cigar Sampler which comes with eight cigars in all sizes and shapes - including a Padron 4000 and a 6000 Series. I spent over $120 at a cigar shop w/ tax. You can find it cheaper online at the Tobacco Locker for $105.