American Microbrews...We Got a Problem

Today after work I had reason to celebrate; I found out the contract for my job got renewed. Yee-haw! I can live in relative comfort for another year. With that in mind I stopped off at Gomer's on the way home to get some beer. Tonight is going to be special I thought to myself, so I'm going to grab something special to drink.

Ray is waiting out in the car for me, and he's already told me to make it quick 'cause he's got to get home to the Mrs. After I grabbed a six-pack of Molson I ran over to the expensive section to find something maybe I've never heard of before. Unfortunately, I don't have time to peruse. Most of the time I skip the American Microbrews and simply grab a European beer. Why grab an American beer that's trying to be like a European beer when you can grab the original - especially when the microbrews, half the time, are more expensive?

Going against my standard rule I'm lured by a $10 microbrew four-pack in a plain brown carrying case with writing on it. It must be pretty limited and special if they didn't try to market it with an ass-kickin' logo, hops drawings, or a reference to place or history - right? The plain writing and cardboard says "For serious connoisseur's only." I thought, yeah, that's me. I'm a serious guy with a serious palate. I don't need anything but white labels, cardboard and some writing to tell me it's good. Add a $10 price tag and I'm tumbling right into your trap.

What's the trap? Goose Island "Demolition" - supposedly a "Belgian Style Ale." Here's what it says on the label:

Back in the early '90's, our landlord went bankrupt and they tore down the mall surrounding the original Goose Island Brewpub. Sure, we were still open, but who would know it with all the demolition going on. We had giant wrecking balls careening around, the walls were shaking... it was tough. We lost a good part of our business for a year, and if not for the most loyal of our customers, Goose Island would have closed. To honor those brave souls, we brewed a golden ale called Demolition. It was so good and so popular, we've brewed it every year since (I even served it at my wedding!) It's brewed with Saaz and Styrian Golding hops for a grassy, citrus aroma and lots of the finest pale malt for a "honey" malt middle and intense flavor. Demolition tastes great on its own or with a plate of fresh oysters." Greg Hall, Brewmaster

That's all fine and dandy but it doesn't taste like any Belgian beer I've ever had. What it tastes like is every other American microbrew: beer that has way too many hops that aren't balanced with the rest of the ingredients. For whatever reason - whether it's the taste of American water or the hops, almost every American microbrew, be it a pilser, a pale ale, or in this case, a Belgian - always has that characteristic too powerful non-balanced taste. I get the feeling that American microbrewers think if its easy to drink, and the hops don't have a prominent place up front, that somehow the beer is commercial or weak. It's like if it's too drinkable, i.e. enjoyable, it's not sophisticated. To be fair, though, Demolition is not a huge offender in comparison to so many others.

In my opinion, what makes a good beer are two components: complexity of taste and drinkability. What's so crazy about that? Every other brewery around the world seems to get this, why can't we?

Probably the only American microbrewery that seems to get this is Gordon Biersch. Too bad you can't find it in Kansas City. Several years ago when I drank their pilsner it actually tasted like an authentic German beer - which means it can be done. I'm ready for more microbrewers to figure this out.

Grey Sweatsocks

In honor of past stories of Coach Jefferies from General Ursus I searched Google images for "grey sweatsocks ugly."

"Rubber Nuts!"

In high school, that was what Coach Harden would call us if he caught us screwing around...

All right you rubber nuts!! Knock it off!

I'm not quite sure what he meant by it, but it still haunts me.

Smoke It If You Got It

RATTRAY'S OLD GOWRIE - It's nice to look back at my older tobacco notes and compare my current perceptions. In this case, I still agree with nearly everything I said about Old Gowrie in 1996 (below), but today I only barely remark the grassiness that I commented on back then. I really enjoy this tobacco. Its flavour is so clean and precise, slightly astringent and citrus on the palate, as if it were perfumed with just a few shreds of lemon rind. The natural Virginia sweetness mixes in with a little peppery sharpness to create a refreshing smoke. The smoke has a satisfying weight as it fills the mouth, particularly upon lighting up. While puffing, I often note that the sidestream smoke has a faintly sweet, aromatic quality to it, which contrasts with its plain, natural flavour. After a while, however, I tend to notice the smoke's spiciness more than its body. The bottom of the bowl can be fairly sharp, but I love its concentrated taste. As with Brown Clunee, one bowl of Old Gowrie doesn't really bite me, but my tongue can get sensitive if I smoke multiple bowls of it. In fact, this is quite similar to Brown Clunee in many respects, with a little less natural sweetness and a little less complexity of flavour. A newbie might find this a little sharp—a fast smoker definitely would. Still, it's well worth smoking at least occasionally, delicious and pleasurable as it is. Sit back and relax. I also like the simple, antique room aroma it gives off as it burns to a fine, light-grey ash. '01

BACK IN '96, I wrote: The taste of these pale yellowish-brown broken flakes is pretty neutral. It is characterized by typical aged-Virginia sweetness, but being based on lighter tobaccos, it lacks the fruitiness of red Virginia blends. The most distinctive aspect of its flavour is a slightly green, grassy undertaste that is quite pleasant and not that common. The closest thing to this that I've smoked is Blatter and Blatter's Danish Slices tobacco, which lacks the greenish note and isn't as rich. This succeeds in being a very relaxing tobacco without being overly strong or coma-producing. Smokes smooth and burns slowly, but easily. The room aroma matches its taste—mild, subtle, and slightly sweet. Competes poorly with other household odours. Review by The Professor's Pipe Tobacco Reviews

McCLELLAND'S FROG MORTON ON THE BAYOU - When vacationing on the dark, placid waters of the Bayou, Frog Morton prefers this smooth, rich, calming Balkan blend, to which he adds just enough of the finest Louisiana Perique. Description from Tobacco Reviews




G.L. PEASE'S ODYSSEY - Ever since I started smoking a pipe, I've been in love with the rich fragrance of fine Cyprian Latakia. There's something warm and comforting about it; the deep blackish brown colour, the fascinating texture of the leaf, the wonderful smells of campfires and leather. It's an assertive leaf that can be, and often is, easily overdone. If the supporting tobaccos are bold enough, though, and have enough character, something BIG can be produced that still has refinement, elegance, and balance.

Odyssey is big. There's no doubt it's loaded with Latakia, but that's much more to it. Exotic oriental tobaccos abound, and wonderful matured red and jet-black stoved Virginias provide a perfect balance, both in the tin aroma and in the flavour of the dense smoke. I worked on this for months, tuning the proportions carefully until it was exactly the blend I was after

The first match yields big puffy clouds of beautiful smoke. The flavour is bold and assertive, but still refined. The Latakia's spice is balanced by the sweetness of the Virginias, and they have a marvelous conversation, while the oriental tobaccos play Baroque quartets in the background. Or, is it belly-dancing music? If you're a Latakia lover, Odyssey will surely enthrall you. - Description from G.L. Pease's official site

ESOTERICA TOBACCIANA'S PENZANCE - The high percentage of dark tobaccos dictate a delicate hand when packing for best smoking.Dark brown in soft, self-crumbling flakes, this is very similar to Bengal Slices with its slow burning (but it does burn well) and its smooth, smoky flavour. Here though, the flavour is more lively and not so one-dimensional. A subtle sweetness, probably due to richer, sweeter Virginias being used in the recipe, joins the rich latakia flavour. The room aroma is also slightly more pronounced. Since this burns cool, I like to smoke it in a big pipe that smokes well but a bit hot. An excellent and relaxing full-English blend that I seem to smoke mostly late at night. - Review found on The Professor's Pipe Tobacco Reviews

When you put it on, something happens...

How's that for a first post?

Recon Mission 8/24/07 and an Hommage to Raymond Carver

Silvio and I had just finished an unsuccessful fishing trip out at the city lake. After a couple strikes of lightening and a rash of chiggers we decided to cut our outing short. Starved and sunburned we headed to the Bamboo Hut for some fried gizzards and baked potatoes. Upon finishing our Styrofoam cups of beer, we ashed our Viceroys and came in from the parking lot. I stuffed a pint of "Cutty" in my coat pocket to mix with our waters while we ate.

The Hut's an institution. It's located off the old highway 40 where as a kid I used to make spending money by stealing wire-spoked hubcaps from indifferent Cutlass Supremes, Delta 88s and Le Sabres parked in the gravel lots of the roadhouses.

After Silvio grabbed us a table in the far corner, I quickly ordered two beers and two waters with swizzle sticks. Sil asked the waitress if she knew his mom and dad and she said, "Yes, I see your mom at Walmart almost once a week. Tell her hi from Judy." This ended up working in our favor because our Cutty and waters went unnoticed. The gizzards were fried in a loose batter that complimented the chewy meat just right.

After we finished the pint of Scotch we tipped Judy our left over cash and stopped off at the bar in front which took us on in to the rest of the night.

Hommage by General Ursus
Photo of Bamboo Hut by Silvio Dante

Ain't No Fool!

Ursus.

Fooled Again?

Willie........

G Dub

Our fearless leader made a stop at the wonderful Riverside Corner Cafe yesterday. This is about 1/4 mile from my office, so I was fortunate enough to get a good view of the motorcade and rooftop snipers, however this photo is courtesy of SpaceyTracey.

There was a lot of hub-ub on talk radio yesterday complaining about the Pres. going from his Plaza hotel, to Riverside, then back to Bartle Hall and all the traffic backup it caused. It must have been a slow news day if that's all they had to complain about. I think it's pretty cool that he ate at a place like the Corner Cafe with the likes of George Brett, Carl Peterson, and Sam Graves (Sam must have gotten the "courtesy" invite). I just hope he was able to experience one of their great cinnamon buns.

Gotta move on..........NOT!.......

Weston - gain serious brownie points

The Mrs. and I visited the sleepy town of Weston, MO this weekend. And even at the risk of being called a sissy-boy, I had a great time. We stayed at a B&B called the Weston Bed & Breakfast, which was ran by a nice couple who had homemade cookies waiting for us in our room, prepared an excellent three course breakfast, and faciliated a lively conversation with the two other couples who shared the breafast table with us. I was admittedly a little nervous about staying at a B&B, I'm not normally one who likes doilys and grandma types hovering over me all the time, but this was really a nice experience. However, I was upset that Larry and his brothers Darryl didn't stop by.

For dinner last night we ate a great little house converted to a restaurant called The Vineyards. The food and service was outstanding, and the full meal took almost 3 hours yet we didn't mind the slow pace at all - it was part of the dining experience.

Today we did some shopping in the historic downtown of Weston. It's filled with all kinds of stores, primarily antiques, but is also home to things like the McCormick's Country Store, and the Old Geezer's Mantiques. My best finds were an antique wood console GE radio that stands about 42" tall, and an antique US Army large steel trunk which I stole for only $5. (Actually the old man selling it kept commenting on how pretty my wife was - so I think that had something to do with the price.)

For lunch we went to O'Malley's. This underground Irish pub and resturaunt had great food and tons of character. Even though we were there for lunch, there was live music and a rowdy crowd. It's definetly a place worth going back to.

All in all, I give two thumbs up for Weston, MO.

The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again (live)

Caught in a fever dream between control and chaos, you can see why some people viewed a Who live show--when they were in their prime as they are here--as a religious experience.

Things start getting really interesting and weird around 6:05.

Flight Of The Conchords - Jenny

This might be my favorite Conchords bit, "Jenny."

"...something like but not necessarily 'Schindler's List.'

The Mysterious Orb of 70's Rock

Journey-Look to the Future, c. 1974




Fleetwood Mac-Fleetwood Mac, c. 1975




What gives? Is the orb some secret drug (coke) or sex reference? There is that drug-like orb in Woody Allen's "Sleeper," but I don't think that's it. I don't get it.

Jeong's Canton Chinese

The General had suggested an evening of R & R for the Canteen soldiers at one of the local mess halls that we may have possibly overlooked as young privates. Jerry's, Neptune's Galley, The Bamboo Hut, and V's were a few of the establishments mentioned as possible candidates.

Any interest from the rest of the troops?

Omaha Zoo '07

D.J. Coyle=Incompetent

Just sayin'

History Lesson: the origin of Conservatives and Liberals

This was forwarded to me from a fellow scholar:

For those that don't know a lot about history...Here is a condensed version...

Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter. The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups: 1. Liberals; and 2. Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed. Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as girlie-men or wussies. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that conservatives provided.

Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth; the elephant Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

A few modern liberals like Mexican light beer (with lime added), but most prefer a chilled glass of Sauvignon Blanc,with passion fruit and kiwi aromas which are marked by grassy notes, then rounded out on the midpalate by peach flavors. Crisp and refreshing, with a hint of chalky minerality on the finish; or Perrier bottled water. They eat raw fish but dislike beef. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.

Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, Ivy League professors, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are liberals. Liberals invented the designated-hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink Sam Adams, Harpoon IPA or Yuengling Lager. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, athletes, Marines, and generally anyone who works productively.

Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living. Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when conservatives were coming to America . They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today's lesson in world history: It should be noted that a Liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to the above before forwarding it. A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be forwarded immediately to other true believers and to more liberals just to tick them off.

Blog Mascot

The Meerschaum Canteen's mascot just came in the mail today from AAA Meerschaum. The above photo is the exact pipe I received...says "sold" right underneath it on AAA's website. The pipe is even more detailed than I imagined and it was delivered promptly.

Flying Burrito Brothers - Sin City

#1 before I came across "A Bay Bay".

"A Bay Bay"...My New Favorite Song

White folks, gangstas and da thugz...

Omaha Zoo '07

CRIKEY!!

You wouldn't wanna be muckin around in this lil buggas environment.

Merv Dies, Rove Flies

Coincidence? I think not.

Gut Bomb Anyone?

Major Moseley told me about this place up in Rochester, New York. Check out the Garbage Plate. I can't look at that photo without thinking about pleasure and flatulence simultaneously.

Zoo '07

DON'T GO IN THE WATER!!!

Image captured in the waters off of Amity Island.

(Chief Brody was not available for comment.)

My Whoppers Diet

It's really awesome, but I haven't lost much weight : 0 (

Omaha Zoo '07

This was taken when me and some friends visited the Omaha Zoo a few weeks ago. It was a very cool place. This looks like a night shot but it's not. Somehow the flash actually did a good job for me this time. Usually I refuse to use a flash because it blows out the colors of the image. Somehow it didn't in this case. I'm pleasantly surprised that I didn't get any glare off the glass that the leopard was behind.

Hey There

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kyf_3gizO2w

Friday Night Fireworks '07

Royals All The Way

A Summer Night At The Royals Game '07

4th of July

A River Runs Through It
starring "The Sarge"

SWEDISH SNUS

Northerner.com

Snus and Health

In recent years, a number of Swedish studies have been published on the effects of snus on health, based on Swedish conditions. Previously published research on oral tobacco products has mainly dealt with product types used in other parts of the world, such as India, meaning the results have not been representative. The information given here is a summary of current research on snus of the type used in Sweden and the rest of the Nordic region.

200 Years of Swedish Snus

Snus of the type used in the Nordic region has a history stretching back nearly 200 years. In Sweden, snus has been one of the dominant tobacco products for an entire century. Its health effects have now been well elucidated in a large number of Swedish scientific studies.

Snus is Fun



Current Research Findings

According to three Swedish studies (of which, two were conducted within the framework of the World Health Organizations MONICA project), the use of snus does not increase the risk of heart attack. However, there are contradictory results regarding the use of snus and other cardiovascular diseases. But snus does not appear to contribute to hardening of the arteries. The use of snus has a direct effect on heart rate and blood pressure. However, it is unclear whether snus causes chronic high blood pressure. Elevated blood pressure has been observed in some studies but not in others.

A Swedish study (within the framework of the World Health Organizations MONICA project) showed that the use of snus does not increase the risk of cerebral hemorrhage (stroke).

Results are contradictory regarding whether snus contributes to an increased risk of age-related diabetes (type-2 diabetes). The largest and most recent Swedish study (Eliason et al, Journal of Internal Medicine 2004) found no verifiably increased risk of age-related diabetes among snus users, although it did find this among smokers.

An expert panel has conducted a risk assessment (published in Cancer Epidemiol Biomarkers 2004) of snus and other products. Choosing snus instead of smoking reduces the risk of death from a tobacco-related disease (defined as lung cancer, oral cancer, coronary diseases and premature death) by 90 percent, according to the assessment.

Phat Phree's 50 Greatest Things About America

The 50 Greatest Things About America

PSA from General Ursus

Lately, it seems I've had more than one conversation with a couple of you guys about girlfriends giving you trouble. I know it's hard to believe but the General had some troubles of his own a few years ago. Desperate I turned to a dating advice column on Ask Men called Doc Love. Once I got over my initial elitism I found it fairly insightful. At first it seemed like a bunch of macho B.S. (a la Tom Cruise in Magnolia), but when I dug a bit deeper I found that it was useful in not only clarifying a bunch of stuff I was confused about, but it actually taught me self-respect - something anyone (male or female) can take away from it.

Find a an article that closely resembles your situation and see if it doesn't help. It's worth a shot.